I gave myself three weeks to write this. As my husband got new posting *that I actually had waited with longing heart, I certainly want to let go each and every losing feeling that I endure for six months. Of much heartache, I was hope only for a change and not more. I think to myself: If this new congregation doesn’t like me, I don’t lose anything as I have no plan to give much.
For six months full I don’t hear any good sermon. Though my husband is the church pastor he never give sermon for that time length. He doesn’t given any slot. For me somehow it was unacceptable knowing that he doesn’t do any corruption nor anything fatale to be given the kind of hindrance. Church members who gave sermon was all shallow and preach topical (don’t they ever learn how to do a Textual or a Expository? I don’t judge with no background here. What is? They hindrance an expository pastor for their topical? Oh man!). My soul is thirsty. Now, in his new post, my husband preach pouring cool water to my dryness. Within three weeks, I already listen five times of him. Perhaps you think I am exaggerating but, no bias and really fair, he is one of greatest preacher I ever hear.
When I left a church in 2005, I felt fail. Why I said that because I feel some hatred from some member towards me. But looking back over my shoulders, the situation in 2005 was not as bad as last year. At the farewell day back then, others than gift from the church, I got some memorable gift from individual church members. At the farewell day all members shake my hand and say thanks and good luck. At the farewell day, the youth presented a special numbers dedicated for us. After few months in our new posting, the youth visit us. It showed their respect and seeing that I think I wasn’t totally fail.
Early this year, at the farewell day, nobody shake my hands to say thanks. At the farewell day, there is no dedication service for us. At the farewell day my husband doesn’t preach. At the farewell day I got no gift. It was really broke my heart that these church members just ignored my 3.5 years *and more actually, of love, service and dedication.
What soothe my heart in this past three weeks is that in the new church I met people who is really humble. I was really fed up with snobs. I meet here those who have little and give much. Those who had enough and give beyond. Those who doesn’t think they are the most righteous in this world and those who simply admire me just for nothing that I did. They don’t need me to prove on how good I teach or how special is my music before appreciating me. They saw me on the midweek prayer and that made enough reason for them to like me. Imagine! Those kind of church members that really light-heart to accompany us for house visit. Those kind that really light-foot to walk us to each member house. Those who after hear our stories and knew that we are not so poor still giving to us of their appreciation. Seriously! I told them my position in the office, my travel stories to different countries and at the end of the day they hand my husband some money to reimburse his gas. This is not about whether you have enough or not. This is about appreciation. They got my respect instantly.
I believe God always has His own ways to teach people. I praise Him for his teaching to me.